Want to change life, where to start?

so for the past year and a half my life has started to take a turn for the worst. ive always been diagnosed with panic and anxiety/depression disorders. but it has started to control my life, it hasn't happened all at once, but slowly this year its gotten worse and worse as to where i don't leave the house much, i can only go about 2 blocks and i start to have major panic attacks and have to return home, ive gained alot of weight because ive become inactive. all i do is sit around or sit at friends houses. im starting my senior year in high school soon and i really need a job, but this panic keeps me from getting a job. im 18 and feel like im never going to make it in the real world. i always feel lazy, i try to find fun things to do but its hard when i cannot leave and go for a walk or go downtown. im only comfortable if i have a ride with some one. this has made my relationship with my girlfriend stressful, as we do not do a whole lot. and we fight alot, we may go to the movies once but other then that its to stressful for me to leave or go places. I use to be able to walk alone anywhere i pleased as long as i want. when i was about 14 i started getting panic attacks, but i had them under control, now i cannot control them. i feel like im not interested in anything. i just sit around the house doing absolutely nothing. i use to see a counselor, i stopped going to one because this year i felt like nothing was working. i made an appointment in a week to see my old counselor. i just don't know what to do and how to change all of this mess. i have 5 siblings and out of those 5 my oldest brother was the only sibling i spent a significant amount of time with. he was more a father to me then my own dad. (ive had issues with my dad not being around when i was 10 years old and started first going to counseling because of issues with my dad doing drugs, and just not being around) but anyway i lost my older brother to crime, hes spending 12 years in prison. it was really hard for me being 14 to lose my only real father figure. up untill now i never linked that to the isolation feeling which may have caused the start of my agoraphobia like state. i havent left the house on my own in almost 2 years now. I just want to be independent and be able to be on my own.. im 18 and i feel like a child, i feel like i cant be on my own or i panic...Want to change life, where to start?
My goodness Michael Jackson has risen from the dead!!! LOL Wol you need to see a therpist. Dont feel ashamed or embarassed.Want to change life, where to start?
just relax, don't keep thinking those thing,you can also find a best friend to help you (or more)
Try this for the next few nights/weeks/months, it will clear things up and help you, your family 巃nd friends enormously NOW AND IN YOUR FUTURE . ?br>
YOU WILL SEE ITS NON BIAS ALSO.?br>


THIS LINK IS ON THE POWER OF PRAYER IN THE NEW YORK TIMES ?a href=''http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/31/health? rel=''nofollow''>http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/31/health



PRAYER橲 DESTINATION: CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE



PRAY IS A TRANS-DIMENSIONAL UP-LINK TO THE CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE



ASK to your Creator in a state that you are CERTAIN that your Prayer will be RESPONDED to, and 嶬now that Your Creator WILL NOT ANSWER REQUEST橲 that comes from a CARELESS and 嶪NATTENTIVE HEART. Pray onto Him as though you SEE HIM and if you don't see him, then verily 嶩E SEES YOU. eg have Full Concentration of your mind and heart as to what you are asking for.?br>
Never will YOUR CREATOR ALLOW YOUR PRAYER to be Lost and the GOOD work any of you be 巐ost, be he male or female.?br>
NOTHING CAN REPEL PREDESTINATION except PRAYER/YOUR REQUEST/ASKING HIM



You may start with O LORD?. Or O CREATOR OF MY??br>


?O Lord / O Creator of my Mind, Body and Soul, if there is a Way Of Life which you Love over 巃ll other Ways of Life in this Universe then please Direct Me towards it, show me the Truth as 嶵ruth and render me help towards that and make it very Clear and Easy for me to understand. 嶴how me Falsehood as Falsehood and help me to avoid that with the greatest of ease. I plead 巜ith you today for help and understanding in this matter with your Infinite Knowledge and Mercy 巓n these matters.?br>


O Lord / O Creator of Me and Mankind, Save and Protect me and my family and friends from 嶴udden Major and Minor - illness, Rape, Murder, Kidnapping, Drowning, Burning, Any 嶵ransport Accidents, Terrorist Bombings, Evil Secret Societies, Pandemic Disease檚, Plagues 巃nd Poisoning, and something falling on us or that we fall of something.?br>


O Lord / O Creator of my Mind, Body and Soul, you have not Created this Universe aimlessly, 巠ou are with blemishes, so save and protest me, my family and friends from all Major 嶤alamities, Disaster, Miseries, illness檚 and depression, sorrow and grief and save and 巔rotect us from the Evils in and around my life, in this Country and from Evils of this World 巃nd the Hereafter.?br>


O Most Merciful of those who show mercy, change my Bad Luck into Good Luck and change 巑y Destiny into a Good and Pleasurable Destiny and shower your Special Blessing and 嶮ercies on me and my family and friends.?br>


O Lord / O My Creator, Forgive me for my Past, Present and Future sins and Wrong Doings 巘hat I may have committed, whether it was committed knowingly or unknowingly by me. ?br>


O Lord / O Creator of my Mind, Body and Soul and everything in the Universe Open the doors 巘o my mind, heart and soul and feed me data from yourself and give me knowledge of this 巜orld, and of the Next world and Spiritual world, make it easy for me to understand it, to act 巙pon it and live my life in the best of ways in order to gain your infinite pleasure and that will 嶦xtremely benefit Me, My Family, Friends and My Country now and in our future.?br>


HERE MENTION/ASK FOR WHATEVER YOU WISH, NEED and DESIRE FOR NOW AND 嶻OUR FUTUREΖΖΖ?br>
THEN END WITH EITHERΖΖPLEASE ACCEPT AND ANSWER MY REQUEST IN THE 嶣EST OF TIME AND WAYSΖORΖmen / Ameen OR? SO BE IT