How would your life change, if you found out (tomorrow morning) that you are THE MESSIAH?

Well, I wouldn't go to work and I would start working on a game plan to change the world. I would need my computer though and since it's running slow, I'd call the phone company and tell them to fix my slow DSL connection OR I'd try to get a cable hook up.How would your life change, if you found out (tomorrow morning) that you are THE MESSIAH?
I'd eliminate evil and poverty, then I'd rest, and it would be good.How would your life change, if you found out (tomorrow morning) that you are THE MESSIAH?
Well everyone would be pretty much screwed because I wouldn't be getting crucified.
I already tried that excuse to get a day off of work. I don't think they would buy it again.
I would get my own talk show and all my guests would be cosmic entities.
Depends on if everyone else knew about it and believed me.



If no one believed me it wouldn't mean anything and I would just assume I had taken some acid that was sitting in someone's pocket for too long. But if I had followers I would perform miracles and cool stuff like that.
I'd think, oh shoot, I'm running out of time. Why couldn't they have told me earlier?
Everyone would be brought to the understanding that they need. If we have souls, they all go to heaven.
I couldn't even imagine how my life would change. Those are some mighty big shoes to fill!
Then I would have to be crucified
i'd have a giant 'I AM THE MESSIAH, WHAT UP NOW?'; party.



PAAAAAAAAAARTY.....water into wine? pshaw, more like water into Jack Daniels!!
I would be in shock.
I would kill all my enemies, but I would do it with an army of sexy ninja Megan Fox clones in skimpy clothing since I am a merciful God.
And how would you feel later that afternoon when you found out everyone is the MESSIAH...?
Greatly. First thing, I would know absolutely and without question that I had gone totally insane. Even if I was nuts enough to not be able to figure it out for myself, my wife would have me ';put away'; in short order.

Getting ';taken care of'; in an institution would certainly be a life changing event.
How come??
I'd lower my rent....!!
i'd send a world-wide apology to the whole world saying ';sorry - i lied - i am not perfect after all - in fact - far from it...';