But recently we've become more open to the idea. We've heard lots of people telling us that having kids totally changes the dynamics of the husband/wife relationship. Some say for the better, while others say for the worse.
Some couples we know regret having kids saying that life without them was happier. Yet other couples tell us that having children together brings a couple closer and only strengthens the relationship.
I know we'll be happy with just each other, but could we be happier with kids in the picture?
As parents, what would you suggest? How did having kids change your life? Do you regret having kids? Or would you strongly advise having kids? Thanks in advance!
Non-parents are also welcome to answer, I'd love to know why you decided not to have kids!!Parents please answer!! How did having kids change your life?
I have no idea, i don't have kids. But what Tiger was saying seems the most realistic. You'll ALWAYS love your kids, but how your relationship with your partner fares? that's another question.
realize this: you'll never have that ';alone'; time with your partner ever again. where it's just you and him without a worry in the world. even if you do take mini vacations away from the kids, they'll always be in your mind. it'll never be the same. so my suggestion would be to savour the time you have now as much as you can... when your relationship has passed the test of time and strengthened to the point where not even a baby can test or destroy it.
when you're ready for kids you'll just know it. and if that ';knowledge'; doesn't come? then you'll know you were never meant to have them!! hope that helps!Parents please answer!! How did having kids change your life?
As you get older, there is nothing more rewarding, in spite of all the ups and downs.
I know an older couple that have no children. They really miss not having children and there is no one there for them for holidays or to share their wealth with. It really is sad.
God provides everything you need when you have children.
Good luck in your decision. God Bless You and your husband.
i can only answer for myself. It has made my life better, fuller. It brings couples closer, unless there are already problem within the marriage and them it often helps tear them apart. I love kids. Mine are grown now but I have lots of grandkids to spoil. I wish I could have had a dozen kids.
I am not a parent. But I want a baby dearly. I want to experience that unconditional love. I dont know how to explain it. I love my husband dearly and wouldnt trade him for the world. But I also believe there is no love like a parents love and I want to experience that.
it really depends on the couple. some couples are definitely not 'made' to have kids...and that's ok.
personally, my husband and i cannot imagine life without our boys now. we were happy together, but we are happier now that we're, well, complete.
in my opinion, a child is the culmination of your relationship. it's that single thing that symbolizes your oneness. and in our case, it made us love each other more.
but again, that's us.
one thing you have to remember is that you and your husband are different from other couples. just because a lot of relationships have crumbled for having kids, it doesn't mean that's the norm.
this is your journey. your married life is what you make it --with or without kids.
Well, having kids certainly isn't for everyone. But it was absolutely the right thing for my husband and me. Our lives are so much fuller with our daughter, who just turned 1. She brings such joy, just watching her discover something new or be amused by the simplest thing. Knowing that I helped God bring a life into this world, and now am helping to create who she will be someday, is the greatest blessing I could ever imagine. And now my husband and I have a greater common interest, to raise our daughter to be the best woman she can be, and see where life takes her. It's just amazing. Also, I finally felt like the person I was supposed to be, as a mom. I had found my calling, if you will.
My boyfriend and I were together happily for 4 years until I accidentaly got pregnant. So far its changed us in the sense that its not just all about us anymore. Theres someone who needs us and counts on us. My boyfriend and I still love eachother just the same if not more although theres alot more we sacrifice for one another. It takes alot of work from the both of us to keep up but we dont mind. We dont regret having kids for the simple fact of love for our child. Small things our son does everyday wether its a smile or his open arms reaching out could never make us regret a thing.
My advice is to just go with the flow. If it happens then go with it, if not then so be it. Enjoy life.
interesting. i've never met anyone with kids who believed that life without them was happier. i have met couples whose relationship deteriorated after having kids, but they still felt the gain they got in their lives from the kids outweighed the damage to the relationship. kids bring something totally new and totally beyond the relationship between just the two of you.
i cannot imagine life without my kids and wouldn't even want to. the changes in my life after kids were seismic. more things are different than stayed the same. there are lots of day-to-day level hassles and stresses, and there have been temporary stresses on the marriage caused by kids, as well. but ultimately my marriage is stronger than it was a decade ago before my first child was born, and my life is more full of purpose, satisfaction, and laughter (and mess, and noise, and craziness).
I have always wanted kids.. so has my wife. so we did. We had one child and things between us changed, we had a second child and things between us.. well there is more and more space between us.
I wouldnt change it for the world tho. I never knew I could love someone so much as I love my kids. I still love my wife and she still loves me, it is just that our focus has changed, from eachother to our kids.
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